I am angry at this life.
At this pain, and the hurt within.
I am angry within myself.
I am angry at the hurting pain that I cannot seem to contain.
I am angry at her, at him, at all of them.
I am angry and I cannot stop it.
The rage pours out in every word that is stated from this mouth,
and still, it seems I cannot stop it.
“I am not angry!” I say but my actions show the hard truth of things.
I am angry inside and out.
I am angry, this I do not doubt.
Why am I angry? , I ask myself.
Too bad myself never answers back.
However, would any answer ever be good enough?
It was the rape, no. Maybe, it was the abuse, no.
Maybe this… or maybe that…
Those maybes never seem to amount to any of the pain
that is on the inside of me but still MAYBE
Maybe I can figure out this anger to release this pain,
but then again, maybe NOT…
Do I want the pain to stop?
Just stop with me for one second and think.
If I am not angry then what am I?
Is happy what I am? If so, how would I know?
Would it show?
So many questions, with limited knowledge, doesn’t seem to get me far.
So here I am angry again! Angry that I can’t stop being angry.
Angry at my kins.
Angry at my friends.
Hell, I am angry with every being.
The day I solve this riddle I will know,
that anger is nothing but a stupid illusion show.
So yeah I was angry, now I am past that!
Because my God had my anger fall back!
– Angelique Janey